oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
We named our party play list daddy issues
when im not freaking out about dying alone and unloved, i actually really enjoy being single
there's a lady drinking out of a red cup in class. HAPPY FRIDAY
nutella sex= disaster
I like to think that tonight was Jesus punishing James Cameron for his role in popularizing "My Heart Will Go On."
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Emergency! LinkedIn connected me to a hotornot hookup from sophomore year... slutty phase sphere has officially invaded grown up professional sphere. My illusions of interweb sexual anonymity have been exploded.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
oh dont worry mom i am not sick my cough is from a recent increase in recreational drug use
that will happen
Randomize
