so now that im really awake i see that my underwear are completely ripped down the side, my shorts are on backwards, i have to go get plan b....i call last night an epic fail or success depending on how catholic i am feeling
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
Rode a jet ski for the first time three days after I lost my virginity. Hell of a week for my vagina.
I swiped a lunchable and a gatorade from my one night stand's fridge, does it count as a date now since a meal was included?
I'm pregaming for my hair cut. Working two jobs definately taught me how to use my time wisely...
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
you want a dog just so you can strap a barrel of hot chocolate around its neck?
You told the cashier at McDonald's not to smell the ones cause you had just got back from the strip club. Good deed.
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I smell like lime and condoms and I really want a waffle. Fuk
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
I don't particularly remember setting a firecracker off in my hand. No more tequila.
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