Send those Picts to my email please. From last night
Ps thx for the porn on my phone
;) ur welcome
Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
PS the last 3 guys I've hooked up with were a CEO, a mechanical bull operator and a magic the gathering player...I need a type...
Ur type is ready and willing
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
My dad just sent me a text telling me to "say hi to all the luscious bitches" at the gay bar. Guess this explains my childhood
You ran away and I found you three blocks later lying by a dumpster because "that's where your life belongs"
apparently "my dealer got arrested" is not an acceptable answer when mom asks "What happened? You look sad today"
well he has a gf so if he picks me up tonight i'll only him finger me
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
No really tho I'm wearing a chucky cheese shirt and yoga pants. If that doesn't scream no sex idk what does
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
