her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
Fun fact of the day the average american will consume 13248 beers in their lifetime.
So for us it's double that?
Precisely.
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
Facebook stalking a girl from Germany is harder then you think.you have to copy and paste all this shit into freetranslations.com then try and piece together an awkward sentence. If only I could put this energy into something productive.
In case you were wondering, it hurts when the bouncer throws your phone at you after kicking you out of the strip club for taking pictures.
Now that I've lowered my makeout age to 21 I have a whole new sea to fish in.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
My boss just lit a candle and said a prayer to get laid tonight ..
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
YOU'D BE LIKE A MERMAID! I'll bring you coffee filters to cover your tits.
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
