i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
In a bar in glasgow talking to a 12 year old about life. Welcome to Kentucky.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
they named it eva bongoria. i had to hit it based on the name alone.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
In a cab. Towels everywhere. Confused.
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
If I believed in "responsibility" and "having limits", I would probably say I consumed too much alcohol in the last 48 hours
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
Anyway, it's clearly a shapeshifting vagina/AT-AT, which I never said I was SEXUALLY attracted to. Just that I liked it.
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
Then you screamed in her face to shut up about thick thighs saving lives because actually they can suffocate people during oral sex
Drunk me is very safety conscious And apparently just as annoyed by her as sober me
Randomize
