Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
my little brother just caught me blowing my step cousin in the lobby bathroom at our family reunion
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
so. which one of us is going to pay for the neighbors new window? it cracked when i threw the bottle at it but smashed when you threw yours.
Just found out Brianna Frost the Pornstar goes to my school. Makes that $35,000 tuition that more valuable.
You were spitting chewed up pretzle into my hands telling me to hold it for you.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
Girl. There is the cutest old gay here. He's approximately 100 years old and kind as shit.
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
All I see when I think of you are dancing penis angels around your head.
Well I was thinking of taking him out for drinks then lecturing him about his drinking... kind of like an open minded intervention
We are not having sex in the fucking kindergarten
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
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