Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
i just saw an ambulance and a fire truck pull away from the dorms. it appears somebody actually IS feeling shittier than me today.
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
I really need to learn how to handle sexual advances from older women
I wish I had your problem
At home depot. Final room inspection is tmrow, gotta paint over the puke stains
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
Dude...that line about her giving me a blowjob to get rid of her hangover actually got rid of her hangover. Spread the word.
By the power invested in me, I now pronounce your taco to be meaty. Meaty taco meaty taco meaty meaty meaty taco.
What if we made a bunch of weed butter and then poured the butter into tiny rectangular molds and then chilled it so it was solid again and then wrapped it with the tin foil wrapping from restaurant butter and then left them at restaurants and wreaked utter havoc.
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
If I don't have hickies that last till tuesday, I didn't do this weekend right
I went over to help her build a porch, but we decided that was too much work, so we just got high and watched Scooby Doo
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Babe, Have you see my pants?
Try Jay street in Brooklyn.. that's where I last remember seeing them.
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