My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
The girl in the white might have stds. I'm strangely okay with this.
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
I dont feel as bad coming home this baked because I gave my 14 year old sister a no drugs talk last night.
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
It's isn't revenge sex until you've cum on her porcelain doll collection.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just had sex with the megalodon show on in the background and it was just as magical as it sounds
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Please god tell me you aren't pregaming your date alone.
Randomize
