We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
Apparently getting a blow job in the mens room from the bar owners daughter will get you kicked out.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
I legit just quacked out loud at a duck on campus. Realized after that there were people around me, they looked at me funny...
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
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