Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
something must definitely be wrong with me if i'm chasing after a guy who cant even get it up
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
The only thing that makes me want to stop the affair is that I am the Monica Lewinksy in this triangle.
Some dude just came up to me and stroked my beard, smiled and left. Shave?
Just met me in 10 years...this lady keeps an emergency wine cooler in her bag
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
Apparently I made a chicken patty, angrily took it out of the microwave, walked outside, and threw it over the balcony. #me
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
Tell me that I didn't just get ash in my Russian and just mix it TF in bc who cares and life has no meaning.
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
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