I took Valium worth by frank. I squabble
Li shadha you vin. It's phot out. I just ate a fried Oreo
Passed out watching pirates of caribbean with vodka in hand. Woke up to jenna jameson, with vodka gone.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
he came in the shower with me...i thought it was going to be nice and romantic...until he started peeing on my leg.
Get caught with marijuana. Cop takes piece. Buy new bong. Circle of fun.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
It's decided. Tomorrow I'm getting a Big Mac and a Dildo
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
You're emotionally mature, right? I said you were.
I have at least four things in my line of sight that have Kermit the Frog on them in my dorm. Does that answer your question?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
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