I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
remind me to tell you what i found stuck to me this morning
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
Making a drinking game out of jeopardy does not mean you studied..
her best friend is in town and she told me that they used to fool around when they were drunk and I'd have to "help keep that from happening"
you motherfucker
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
Lol. I get my husbands paycheck every week. Immediate deposit into my purse next to his balls.
i got kicked out of McDonald's for demanding a margarita mcflurry
As much as I trust your struggle imma deal with being Eskimo brothers with my own sister before I get to that
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
Randomize