There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Took his v-card last night. Yet another experience I didn't expect to have in my thirties.
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
It was at that moment that I realized I was alone. Alone and drunk on an Epcot ride.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
I think that's the first time I've heard someone say "this is the safest way of doing things" while holding half a gallon of jagermeister
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
your body is your temple. do you really want a bunch of dicks in your temple?
I was woken up at 6 am by a second grader trying to give me a sweatshirt for a pillow
At one point in the night, as we were running from the cops, I clearly remember you yelling "little gnomes are tickling the insides of my body!" ...that high.
Nothing says I'm doing some sketchy shit like coming out of your bedroom with your underwear inside out
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