Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
I'm gonna take off my shirt and spin it around my head like petey Pablo so u can find us
Wake up. We're going shopping for booze and samurai swords.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Was asked out on a date tonight on Linked In. That creepy genius at apple that touched my butt one time in the back stairwell. I thinks it's fair to say I've hit rock bottom.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
I just spent 12 consecutive hours in the same outfit and none of it was pajamas. If that's not personal growth, I don't know what is.
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
You kept shouting about how you were the king of all bitches...and doors, for some reason.
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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