he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
just fit an iguana in a condom...have pics
he yelled 'rock me amadeus!' when he came
i love that song!
NOT THE POINT
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
You hid from a cop under some guy's canoe on his lawn.. It didnt work
In a shocking revelation, I learned that the Easter Sunday shit show happened not because of vodka but because my gay neighbor drugged me.
Oh my fucking god you idiot bitch just get here forget about the vodka the fucking cops are looking for you
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
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