yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Hurry up. We're trading phones to prevent drunk texting.
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
It's confirmed. I have two dates on Saturday, and they are both named Mike.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
