All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
i was hoping the water fountain would somehow shoot out vodka this morning
Party at my house. Liquor pinata. Your presence is required.
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Not even drunk me wanted to have sex with him. I kept intentionally hitting my head on the table behind me during sex till he said i was too drunk for sex.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I woke up at 5:47 in the morning to you peeing on my parents bedroom floor. I think we've established that you have a limit .
Ya he's the booze devil, like if the black hole and Bermuda triangle joined forces with Captain Morgan
You were convinced you would hurt my car if you opened the door. Then you barfed in the pretzle bucket Peter gave you
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
It's the eve of Christ's birthday and I'm sending pictures of my tits
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Randomize
