I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
Theres a picture of you standing next to a John Wayne cardboard cutout that says dont drink and drive. your buddy is shirtless holding a beer and youre holding your keys up with marker on your face.
Just picked them up. It took 6 holes and a handle of rum to evolve from golf to a demolition derby.
There's an entire pit crew of cart boys surveying the golf cart destruction.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
How do I enter a double puke and rally into my calorie counter?
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Instead of saying hi she asked if she could touch your dick through your ski bib and NOW I understand why you wore it to the bars
We literally laid down in the back of my car and had sex in a parking lot and it was in the top 3 best moral-less decisions I've made.
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
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