Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
I told him to go down on me and when he did he started crying!! I asked him why and he said my vag looked just like his ex girlfriends!!!
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
he passed out on the stove with a cup in his hand. yes the pictures are hilarious
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Lesson of the night: never take shots out of a bottle you found under a couch in a frat house. I have no idea where I am
My roommate was being an ass so I put everyone's drinks/shots on his tab for the entire night. Then when we left he was telling me how he got out cheaper than last time.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
You're moving up the public shitting ladder
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