Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
spell your last name, im trying to find you on facebook
hahah your definitly as dumb as I think I thought you are. boom roasted.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
I have diapers under my sink. trying to convince myself to use them.
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
you ass-dialed me while you were fucking my ex.
that was on purpose.
She fucked my eyebrows.. I've never had that done before.
Wait... Plucked, or Fucked?
Fucked, but I understand your need to clarify
That was my first party and they were so suprised that this little freshman girl was a FUCKING BEER PONG QUEEN.
Randomize
