to do: lose virginity to hamster dance
Haha Tomato, Tomato. That doesn't work very well via text message.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Tell your friends I said hi and that if they touch your penis I'll cut off their hands.
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
If sandwichs had dicks, my life would be complete
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
She was doing drunken zumba and screaming "FUCK YOU I HAVE MY OWN STYLE!" at the TV
I know it's New Year's Eve but if you're going to have a bunch of chicks playing strip go fish in our apartment I need a heads up.
Randomize