Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(571): View more from Virginia

i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame

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(603): View more from New Hampshire

...you put a chicken patty in my toaster last night..

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(404): View more from Georgia

best googles of the semester: toe fucking, purpose of two nostrils, human tail. with pictures

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(416): View more from Toronto

Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.

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(918): View more from Oklahoma

I did, I'm just saying. Once the drinking starts my nipples are no longer my control.

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(414): View more from Wisconsin

I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.

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(+61): View more from Australia

BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON

(+61): View more from Australia

SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE

(+61): View more from Australia

THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.

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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

I AHVE A WINE BUCKETTTTTTT

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(704): View more from North Carolina

You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"

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