Is it weird if I ask my drug dealer to prom? Be honest.
I know I'm all grown up when I don't have to take my pregnancy test in the store bathroom anymore.
They refer to his house as "the abortion clinic". Cant wait.
there are people swimming in the fountain next to the library... hello senior week
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
I'd feel sorry for him and his injury but it's an inconvenience for my vagina
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
You should have. Partying with 60 year olds and batman is so much better than partying with bitches our age.
MY BRAIN IS OSCILLATING. DOES THAT EVEN MAKE SENSE
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
Dicks are not precious.
I'm too pretty to go to jail. Especially in Louisiana.
Dude why is my bed and bedding wrapped in bubble wrap?
Cuz u wanted to insure u had a safe sleep
Randomize
