A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
So...AT&T finally added picture messaging for iPhone...bring on the tits!!!
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
But I love Penises too much to give up on them. My phone capitalized Penises. It's like it knows I respect them
When I start carrying a bottle in my hand, jumping from boat to boat with a grenade horn. YOU should know this isn't going to turn out well.
Everyone already knows you're a drunk, they understand.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
driving home I had the GPS in one hand and puking in the coffee cup
So no more sangria road trips?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I round house kicked her emotions in the face
My neighbor was my D.A.R.E officer and I feel like I've defeated him by smoking weed outside everyday
Do you think in an oreo forest they would have rivers of milk?
dude. I can hear the air.
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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