I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
the cool security guard showed me the video clip of how i sat criss-cross-applesauce on the elevator for 20 minutes last night
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
sex in a hospital.. check
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I just broke a sweat masturbating on a Friday night. I may need a boyfriend.
if they didn't want us to do blow at uni, why would they make textbooks so smooth?
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