the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
never play flip cup with pint glasses
Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
I told my new friends about my possible new chin. They said I should get my nose done first. Please tell me I'm pretty or something.
Acid is not a monday night drug
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
And the night ended with some random dude pissing on a car in a vain attempt to find a proper bathroom. We, the drunk, salute you, sir!
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
There's a kid in the back of the class drinking out of a flask. Like what is going on?
NOW HE'S DRINKING OUT OF A HANDLE. WHO IS THIS KID?
I need vodka mixed w a bit of holy water right now
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
He's got a beautiful penis, I can't lie
After she got off the phone with her mom she sprinted down the block screaming "I'M SO GOOD AT BEING A HUMAN!!!!!!!!!!!!!"
Randomize