My booty call said shes done doing the walk of shame. Wtf is that?
It's what anyone that sleeps with you, specifically, does when they leave. Some do it even when they just think of you.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
I will also be strapping forties to the puppies.
yeah, but the first step is admitting you have a problem, the next step is kidnapping him
We had sex in the tent after his 6th beer and while we were at it we had conversations with the people outside the tent.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
Well I just found a coupon for cheese in the bathroom so I've got that going for me
He stole me a cantaloupe and we drunkenly broke into a park and ate it on a bench with my pocket knife. I think i need to marry him
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
I need my comforter. Pls bring it to me and drape me in it like an animal pelt. Ps I'm naked.
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize
