please tell me I'm in your upstairs bedroom. Just google mapped myself and I have no idea where I am.
just wrote on a church. and then stalked a boy, by the way, i fucked him. him being your friend, also, love tacos.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
Suuuuuuper drunk and just sang fuck her gently to the chiminea. I'm in bad shape.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I have a cracked rib, no way in hell I'm bottoming for him tonight!
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
I saw a spider on my bed and my first reaction was to throw my weed bag to safety
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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