If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
so i hit rock bottom, god threw me a shovel. i continued to dig.
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
she was home schooled till college. were she learned how to give the most amazing blowjobs is still a mystery.
i was told that i was found face down in a plate of ketchup at the dinner table
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Don't worry I'm alive. The apt is all locked up so I'm sleeping on the patio. The frozen pizza I got might be toast unless someone lets me in soon. If not its all good I'll be here snoring on the patio
I think he's speaking German to me now
Nevermind, he's just drunk and not texting properly
You shall now refer to my vagina as patty and patty only
Okay, so when I go to meet your grandma, let's do a quick cum check to we don't have another "what's that on your face?" situation.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
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