Well you know what I always say about freshmen.... If you want it, and they've got it... get it.
like if they didnt have tits and vagina, they have no idea how uninteresting to us they would be
I got out of bed with her to go smoke a bowl with her roommate which was fine but I passed out when I went upstairs to take a piss.
Yeah.. she's probably not gonna call.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
I'm skyping with my parents and reading Cosmo articles on giving great head. I'm on a roller coaster that only goes up, baby.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
Okay throwing up in my mouth a little = time to go home
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
I think my body knows it's dying and is just shutting down
I'm eating cheesecake with my hands completely naked while falling asleep
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
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