fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
I've never been 12-exclamation-point-excited for sex. That must have been good.
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She got a text from her mom saying "you better not sleep with him, we all know how he is". IV ONLY BEEN HERE A WEEK
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
DO YOU REALIZE HOW AWESOME MY GRANDMA WOULD BE IF SHE GOT HIGH
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
just creeped your profile pictures and you should feel satisfied in knowing that you had great eyebrows even before people started drawing them on
Randomize
