The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
I just need to actually convince myself that drunkenly having sex won't help me forget the last time I drunkenly had sex, it only makes the situation worse.
He kept making me pretend I was his personal trainer. When I swallowed his cum he made me pretend I was drinking a protein shake. Thats actually what it tasted like.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
We bonded over blowjobs and stories of our childhoods. It was beautiful.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
He yearns for your heart.
He needs to stop being a pussy about it.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
Randomize
