Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
how are things with the new girl?
good, we have nothing in common but she likes being choked
I'm laying in my house looking at chocolate pudding drip from the ceiling onto my partially erect penis... Yay for shrooms!
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
they told me that it was glow in the dark and would make me magical. I was too drunk to say no. I woke up to a purple vagina.
its like a neon Im stupid as fuck sign
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