this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
So I finally got the Patron washed off my boobs.
whats a positive sounding word for "exploit"?
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
she was handing out condoms w/ her number on them...
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I AM OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. YOU ARE OBSESSED WITH PORCHES. HOW IS THIS REAL?
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
