I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
normally i'm against accepting campers on facebook but this one saw me giving head to another counselor and didn't say shit about it to my boss so i feel like shes earned the right to look at my sloppy drunk pictures
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
the water pistols in the freezer are full of voddka.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I'm about to have a bowl of Advils... without any fucking milk.
No fucking Jell-O shots or meth. Those are the rules
Just don’t be like me and break up between Christmas and NYE and then get blackout on NYE and puke in your undies.
See that doesn't work because we've had sex so its awkward for you to call me mom
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
