I swear she didn't look like that last week.
i think i have herpe
just one?
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
I tried to get you a girl. They want us to cook breakfast though
Lolll I'll be sleeping
I'm practically buying you a 1 way ticket to pound town.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Please don't give away my fajitas
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
