FUCK TREES I CLIMB BUOYS MOTHERFUCKER
STOP listening to that song
You'd think after all these years of evolution that it would be longer than a golf pencil.
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
I dont know why people are racist. Both the mexicans and the irish gave us holidays where everyone drinks on a wednesday.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
Banana suit guy has an entourage and they're all douchebags. There is no god.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
There's nothing more awkward than going on a beer run with 3 ten year olds....teacher of the year right here!
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I've seen too many dicks in the past week. I can't do it anymore.
It's gotten to the point that I'm pretty sure I'm going to need to be legally drunk before I enter the voting booth this year.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
Randomize
