Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
I bought this skirt with every intention to have it wrapped around my tits by the end of the night. So, I'm not a whore. I'm a self-fulfilling prophecy.
not sure how we got back down, broken rib says we didn't use stairs
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
just letting you know, you took a hit of the blunt while sleeping. happy birthday
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Super awkward that I just now realized I added no verb to the first statement about super hero porn. We were watching it, not making it. Clarity.
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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