found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
the new roommate knocked on my door this morning holding a bong in one hand and my dennys leftovers from last night in the other. love this kid. Best student housing placement ever.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
He had the Transformers symbol tattooed to his chest. We had to do it doggy style so I could laugh into my pillow instead of his face.
WHERE ARE MY FUCKING EYEBROWS?!
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Doing lines of coke with a $100 dollar bill off a 6in x 9in photo of your childhood self really tells you where you where you've gotten in life.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
I just pawned the ring from my ex boyfriend to replace the ring I lost from my current boyfriend. #thanks
This drunk girl kept yelling for water so I dipped a cup in the toilet and gave it to her. She was thanking me all night.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
You just can't go back to being friends with someone after you sucked their balls
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