I hate your face
Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
I AM TEN TEQUIA SHOOTS ON AND I JUST SAW SOMEONE DO A BODY SHOT OFFF OF JESUS
THIS FEELS SO WROG AND OH SO RIGHT
be warned: you might find a baby hampster in my bra
Boobs are out for the taking
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
That sounds good. I'd totally blow you somewhere quick but im not in the frame of mind to think of a place
Be outside in 5
Randomize
