did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
perhaps when you are drinking red wine from a tall glass with a straw it is time to call it a night.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
Look on the bright side, you can mark 'beastiality' off your bucket list
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
How much morphine is too much? Keep in mind that I'm going to my graduation dinner with my parents.
whatever the appropriate amount of shots is to consider drunken acrobatics a good idea was a few less than I actually had
Know what was probably a bad idea? Using white wine as a mixer for vodka.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
We smoked weed. AS A FAMILY. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL.
No fair. I need a fuck buddy to entertain me till the power comes back on
I just got to my parents hungover as hell. My dad could tell and said "theres only one cure for a hangover" and handed me a beer. This morning went from a 0 to 10 in an instant.
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