We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
Don't really want to talk about it. You were right. She had a whole jar of toenail clippings on her nightstand that she chews on "when her fingernails are too short." Direct quote.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
i just got on a party bus. i think i left my belly button at the bar.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
12 trash cans filled with water. Beer cans floating in each, 12 ft apart. Dodgeball. Ultimate beer pong.
Rules. We have to wear superhero outfits
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
He said he was gonna go pull a lochte and the next thing we know he's outside ass naked peeing in the neighbors kiddie pool.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
What shitty, shitty thing could you possibly tell me that doesnt top the fact that i got hammered and showed everyone i could shit while running
When he was fat he reminded me of my high school best friend and I just wanted to hug him and hug him. Also, he's funny and humor is the fastest way into my pants after Doctor Who and liquor.
NATIONAL GIVE A BOSTON COP A BLOW JOB BITCH ROAD TRIP NOW
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
its liver damage thursday
Randomize
