ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
2pm: Breaking news alert: I think I'm finally sober. Oh, and that place needs hotter strippers.
Well, my mom brought up me being vague about losing my license and she gave me the intervention look. so i left before they could bring out their heartfelt letters...
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
I'm practically paying him in tacos to have sex with me.
Solid teamwork gives us a good shout of both bringing home trophy cougs
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
Thanks for the Beyonce article. In other news, I just passed a man with the state of Florida tattooed on his face.
I'm very impressed by your ability to explain a story about your fiery snatch solely in emojis. props.
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