You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
Have thirty minutes until my shift starts. My heart says liquor store but my future says no
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Getting arrested together sounded so much more fun in theory.
I have pictures of you scratching against the sliding glass door on your knees screaming how you felt like a lamb.
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
I appear to have wine on my toes. I am really not clear as to how this happened. I'm gonna have a little lie down.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
are you drinking tonight?
I have an exam tomorrow
so yes.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
Randomize
