I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
you told the cop you blew a .08 because you ate poppy seeds
Come see our sink grown plant.
im contemplating emailing my dad and telling him how worthless i am and how sorry i am that he pays for my life...aka my bar tabs.
Walk-of-shaming home in that dress you got arrested in. Six guys called out your name when I walked past. I've never been more proud of us.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
She said we could only have sex if she got to keep her fake moustache on during
How will you ever teach your dogs to pee outside when the biggest puddle on your bedroom carpet is from you?
I may have had several rum punches and then gone to the store and used European cucumbers to prove my baton twirling prowess.
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
Banged former boss. Adulthood achievement unlocked.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
just hooked up with a guy ON MY CAMPUS VISIT. god only knows whats gonna happen when im actually a student
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