Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
I really should sober up and deal with this hangover
It seems to be one of those life decisions I'm perfectly content never making though
i gave you head in a backbend. if that doesnt say happy birthday i dont know what does.
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
This coming from the girl who broke up with a guy because she found out he played the tuba in middle school.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
We ended not having sex. I didn't want to explain that I was wearing a Unitard because all my socks and underwear were dirty.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
There's a man with a stuffed dog and a can of dog food on the L. Should I break it to him?
Best not to. Some people need their delusions.
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
I guess I can check "drink alone in the dark" off my bucket list
Randomize
