She just asked to stimulate my prostate, man law requires you come pick me up
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
Update. It gets worse. A) he's done viagra and B) he wears socks at all times.
im getting my college education on yahoo answers.
Halloween 2010: the NuvaRing girls. You're Thursday. We'll walk into the party chanting "Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Everydaaay".
it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
Just woke up from a weed coma and found a stem in my bra. Rainy day success.
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
Randomize
