Whod you bang
Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
Fuckkkk i made out with a freshman.....but he's old for his age. THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOURE NOT AROUND.
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I hate when you actually try to sing and people think you're joking so you just go with it, but on the inside you're crying.
I'm using the house around the corner that my parents rent out to people as a means of getting sex. I just tell them I'm going for a walk and just invite my next hook up over
Do you know that you can buy Cialis in Mexico? Best. Honeymoon. Ever.
I just want a relatively mentally stable guy with tattoos and facial hair that loves Captain America as much as I do and will fuck me the way I deserve to be fucked, is that too much to ask for?
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
Randomize
