Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
who let me buy 6 packs of big league chew? and eat them all? thats not cool
its like playing clue every morning after we party. she did him in the kitchen with..oh god.
Have you ever noticed how boring internet porn is after you cum? I can't shut my computer fast enough.
Renamed my iPod as 'the titantic' so when I plug it in it's says 'the titantic is syncing.'
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Better than road-head. Just got model-home-head. Also got a disapproving scowl of judgment from the realtor on the way out.
We need to drink more. Just think how awesome it would be to wake up in a trailer and NOT remember how wee got here.
Its a holy bong. We had to bless the holy bong water.
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
returning from a 6am booty call in 2 feet of snow on a Tuesday is a bold new kind of low for me
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
