I found a dealer that takes plastic. I'm so in trouble.
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
I also tried to drunkenly adopt a kitten last night. It didn't pan out.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
I figured it out. If I have at least 4 shots of vodka before I start my day, EVERY day will be a good day.
You are. Embrace it. But you are the right kind of asshole.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
You give an incredible blow job. I wanted to make sure you know it was appreciated
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
He took a shit in my shoe. A part of me is livid and a part of me is impressed because that’s some real evil genius.
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
Randomize
