3.50 mugs at the bar.
Nah man, im with an ugly chick. Im waiting til everyone's drunk enough tonight, they don't notice.
How ugly, and does she have friends?
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I also would have accepted most things ending in "job", erotic favors, and food.
Say something like you want him to fuck you behind a McDonald's. Guys secretly love weird shit like that.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
thanks for not wanting to stay all night or talk or anything, nice to have a fuck buddy who really doesnt take the buddy part serious
I'm all about the fuck
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