bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
I want you to know that after i type the word "your" vagina is next on my predictive tex
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
When a man can't even pay attention to you when you're telling him about how big his penis is, there's something wrong
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
He either works for the Irish Mob or I'm being Catfished
He ate the contents of an ashtray and didn't puke, I think he can handle drinking a fifth to himself.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Well, personally I like to keep my blackmail in well organised folders.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Randomize